You Can't 'Have it All', But the AOC Discourse is Not It

Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez is freezing her eggs and this feels like a really big deal. Not because she’s the first public figure to share that she’s doing this because of course she’s not.

What feels so different about Ocasio-Cortez’s egg freezing journey is how she’s letting us in: It feels like the type of vlog-style content we would have seen years ago, the kind we rarely see anymore in the era of polished brand partnership. 

Of course, she’s not an influencer; she’s a politician, and by letting us see into such a personal experience this way, she’s proving why she’s a whole different type of politician, one who has a completely different relationship with the public than what we typically see. 

Maybe that’s why people feel so compelled to weigh in on what she’s doing (oh, who are we kidding? People would weigh in no matter what). 

Specifically, a lot of people are weighing in on the notion of “having it all”. They’re arguing that the #girlboss era convinced women they could put off having children, opting instead to focus on their careers. And you know what? There’s a nugget of truth here. We were raised to believe we could have it all. We were told that egg freezing was an insurance policy. We are now seeing many women who spent loads of money on the technology, only to find it’s not at all a guarantee (though perhaps this is being overstated right now, as Ocasio-Cortez points out.)

Yes, egg freezing isn’t the right option for everyone. It’s worth noting that the congresswoman acknowledges this: She talks openly about how this would not have been a possibility for her years ago, when she was the age many women are when they’re told they ought to freeze their eggs. 

But this can still be a wonderful option for so many people — and ultimately, this woman, just like every other woman, has to figure out the path that is best for her.

That’s what Ocasio-Cortez is doing. She’s not only doing the thing that feels right for her, she’s taking us all along, giving us all the context, sharing a layered look at the whole process…and yes, becoming fodder for conversation about the notion of having it all in the process.

And while I don’t think you actually can "have it all", I know that this is exactly the type of content that helps women realize what pieces of the puzzle are actually right for them.