Some of Us Are Hiding in the Bathroom

Yesterday, one of my colleagues (squarely on the cusp of Gen Z and Millennial, so I took it with a grain of salt) recommended a "personal growth" podcast to me. So naturally, I did what any curious, overstimulated millennial mom does: I opened Apple Podcasts and started scrolling. One episode caught my eye: “I’m in my early 30s — here are a few things I’m still learning.”

Now, I looove a self-reflective queen. But I’ll admit, I almost immediately rolled my eyes. Not because I’m against introspection, but because lately it feels like everywhere I turn, someone is telling me the five things they’ve learned, or the seven things I need to be doing for my health and wellness. Meanwhile, I’m just trying to sneak to the bathroom without an audience.

You’re telling me about your ten-step skincare routine; I’m just proud I remembered deodorant.

I hate to say it, but the sentiment that “we all have the same 24 hours” simply isn’t true. Not when you have tiny humans depending on you for everything from snacks to emotional regulation. And yet, we keep being fed this narrative that if we just optimized a little harder, meditated a little longer, or journaled a little deeper, we’d finally “have it all together.”

This weekend, I read (almost) an entire book while my baby napped, and it reminded me that rest can be productive, and that stealing small moments of joy is just as important as checking things off a to-do list. Maybe we don’t need another list of lessons or morning routines. Maybe we just need to give ourselves permission to pause, and in that pause, remember who we really are.

Ask Clara: Why is sleep important for women's health?